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The Money Taboo
What Happens if We Actually Talk Specifics About Money?
Do your friends know how much money you make? How much — or how little — you have to live on?
Do you know how much they make? Beyond just a general, ballpark guess based on lifestyle clues?
When you get together to grab drinks and dinner, are there unspoken negotiations around what to order, about “splitting something for the table”? What happens when the bill comes? When you chose where to go, was there any discussion about who could — and couldn’t — afford certain places?
There’s such a taboo about talking about money. And this hurts us all — not just women and not just in the workplace, about which we were recently reminded on Equal Pay Day — but anyone who feels they cannot speak up about their everyday realities, the challenges we face when we’re already juggling the bills, triaging their due dates, finally thinking we can make it all work out…and then the dishwasher breaks.
Maybe we can’t talk about it, but we’re surely always thinking about it. Paying intense attention to it. Watching how everyone else is doing. Wondering if we’re falling short.
Money is definitely a lot on my mind these days. Tax time has something to do with it, of course, but it’s bigger than just a whopping tax bill…
